Release

Okay for those of you who read my blog and no NOTHING about the BDSM lifestyle I do not have the patience to try and explain it all today.  Needless to say if you have questions about anything I write feel free to leave your questions as a comment or track me down on fetlife. 

I have not played in forever!  I am literally starving for a much needed trip into sub space.  It is much like depriving a plant of water.  It WILL in fact die.  Now I am not saying that I am about to fall over and die of not getting a BDSM inspired release but I am saying that the need is very much there.  I wish it were about sex sometimes.  That I could get if I wanted it.  It’s more than that.  It is very much about someone taking instruments that on their surface do not look dangerous and inflicting at least some amount of pain.  It is even more so about someone taking that control. 

Statement of fact:  If you are reading this from  my fetlife link — I am not talking about just ANYONE taking that control.  There are men in my community that I trust and would be able to find that release with.  I am not seeking some random guy to come and try to dominate me.  That is not what this post is about.

**side note:  it’s terribly sad that I even HAD to put that statement of fact in this post.  It is a testament to the state of this lifestyle. 

Okay, back to my thought process.  I’ve had offers to play but the truth is I don’t know exactly what kind of play I am looking for.  I mean if you were to take the entire list of different types of play I wouldn’t even know where to begin!  I mean the idea of some needle play sounds nice but I also am in the mood for a little pain (notice the word LITTLE).  Being this wound up is really driving me crazy.  I just want one evening where I can absolutely let go and find that escape that has been eluding me.

So I am going to several events this weekend and will be out and about around tons of kinky people but my fear is that even in the midst of all these events I am going to wake up Monday morning being even more wound up than I already am.  That would totally suck!!